2010

Haha. It's nearly February and I am just now saying happy new year. Has adulthood really run its course on my subtle insanity?

Before I trail off, let me say what is on my mind first. Though it is 2009, my mind has already reached 2010. You see my mind moves 5 paces ahead of my thoughts, which in turn moves 5 paces ahead of my actions. You would think this was a good thing. "Think before you act," they say. 

And I do. And therein lies the problem. 

I wish I could explain it properly, but the easiest way to understand it is to call it jumping the gun. Still, it is hardly a fair assessment. That only implies that there was no thought beforehand. It implies that it was quickly thought out and a quickly executed decision. That is not the case, for in my mind I have deduced several complicated plots that I simply over looked what was simply there. 

It seems I may have lost my ability to think in a simple manner. Everything feels complicated. 

Is this what happens when you become an adult? Responsibility begins to consume you?Everywhere you run to you are forced to think even more? 

Now do not be fooled. I am particularly alarmed and ironically comforted by this fact; it is my desire to learn and grow, but I am not deathly afraid of my new moment. I am alarmed, yes, intrigued without a doubt, and simultaneously overwhelmed. It is nerve wrecking. I am exhausted. Yet, I also feel excited and strangely rejuvenated. 

New house. New president. Relatively new job. Relatively new distractions. New responsibilities. And now a rediscovered self. 

This is indeed a new year.