Apologies

It seems I'm disappointing everyone left and right. You see, today is the perfect example of nightmares are made of, I wish I would just wake up, but I can't.

I can't.

I've discovered a new meaning of hell as I scraped off the remnants of my term. With each scrape, I felt the pain Prometheus felt as he pushed up the boulder forever ever more. And for me, scraping the paint felt like forever more because it gave me time to think. And the more I thought, the more tears would fight to come out. Before I thought hell was constantly falling. When you got too comfortable you would see the ground, after that short fright, you would fall again. Now I know, hell is seeing someone else, anyone else, suffering because of you. Hell is being the cause of someone else's misfortune. I learned this today, the hard way. I learned this today.

So what now.

Change. I never want to see a day like this again, and I will go out of my way to make sure it doesn't happen.